Do you remember when you were little and you'd look at all the clothes your Barbie doll had and they all seemed so glamorous and ruffly and strapless and if only they made clothes like this in my size, I'd be the happiest girl in the world?
Too bad not all of us grew out of that phase, eh?
Edit: Whoops. I do actually know the difference between knit and crochet. Honest. I was in a hurry to post and in scanning through the tiny thumbnails of reader submitted fug on my hard drive, I thought the crochet stitches looked like garter stich, and the braided decoration were cables. I'm sure the email was something along the lines of "I know this is crocheted, buuuuut..." So, that's why the crocheted item.